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Maxioms by Stephen Wright

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When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a read more

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'

by Stephen Wright Found in: Sleep Quotes,
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My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he read more

My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

by Stephen Wright Found in: Babies Quotes,
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I put a new engine in my car, but forgot to take the old one out. Now my car goes read more

I put a new engine in my car, but forgot to take the old one out. Now my car goes 500 miles per hour. The harmonica sounds amazing.

by Stephen Wright Found in: Automobiles Quotes,
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on read more

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

by Stephen Wright Found in: Cats Quotes,
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The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle read more

The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.

by Stephen Wright Found in: Jokes Quotes,
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