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Maxioms by Terry Pratchett

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’I'd have you lot up in front of the University authorities first thing in the morning, if it wasn't for read more

’I'd have you lot up in front of the University authorities first thing in the morning, if it wasn't for the fact that you are the University authorities . . .'

by Terry Pratchett Found in: University Quotes,
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Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended. And read more

Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended. And this is all very natural and organic and in tune with mysterious cycles of the cosmos, which believes that there’s nothing like millions of years of really frustrating trial and error to give a species moral fiber and, in some cases, backbone.

by Terry Pratchett Found in: Evolution Quotes,
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"Why does everyone run toward a blood curdling scream?" mumbled the Senior Wrangler. "It is contrary to all sense."

"Why does everyone run toward a blood curdling scream?" mumbled the Senior Wrangler. "It is contrary to all sense."

by Terry Pratchett Found in: Irony Quotes,
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It's not enough to be able to pick up a sword. You have to know which end to poke into read more

It's not enough to be able to pick up a sword. You have to know which end to poke into the enemy.

by Terry Pratchett Found in: Weapons Quotes,
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The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf Quimby II as read more

The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf Quimby II as Patrician of Ankh-Morpork some legislation was passed in a determined attempt to put a stop to this sort of thing and introduce some honesty to reporting.Thus, if a legend told of a notable hero that all men spoke of his prowess any bard who valued his life would hastily add except for a couple of people in his home village who thought he was a loony, and quite a lot of other people who had never really heard of him. Poetic simile was strictly limited to statements like: His mighty steed was fast as the wind, on a fairly calm day, say about Force Three, any loose talk about a beloved having a face that could launch a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed own a very large seaport. Patrician Olaf II was eventually killed during an experiment conducted in the palace grounds to prove the disputed accuracy of the proverb The Pen is mightier than the Sword.In his memory it was decided that the proverb would from now on include the phrase: only if the Sword is very small and the Pen very sharp.

by Terry Pratchett Found in: Legends Quotes,
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