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The Almighty in His infinite wisdom did not see fit to create Frenchmen in the image of Englishmen.

The Almighty in His infinite wisdom did not see fit to create Frenchmen in the image of Englishmen.

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This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I read more

This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I have watched my crowds dwindle. I am going nowhere, and nowhere quick, but, those of you who have children, I am sorry to tell you this, but they are not special. Wait! I know some of you are going "what, what?" Let me just clarify: I know YOU think they're special ... ha ha ha! I'm aware of that. I'm just here to tell you, that they're NOT! Ha ha ha ha! Sorry. Did you know that every time a guy comes he comes two-hundred million sperm? One out of TWO-HUNDRED MILLION – that load, we're only talking about one load – connected: gee, what are the fucking odds? Do you know what that means? I've wiped nations off've my chest with a grey gymsock. ENTIRE CIVILISATIONS HAVE FLAKED AND CRUSTED IN THE HAIR AROUND MY NAVEL! [...] I've tossed universes in my underpants while napping. Boom! A Milkyway shoots into my jockeyshorts: "Unngh ... what's for fucking breakfast?!"

by Bill Hicks Found in: Humour Quotes,
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As regards rap music, I believe that the "c" is silent.

As regards rap music, I believe that the "c" is silent.

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Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains read more

Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them.

by Simon Wiesenthal Found in: Humour Quotes,
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Let the little fairy in you fly!

Let the little fairy in you fly!

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The wise musicians are those who play what they can master

The wise musicians are those who play what they can master

by Duke Ellington Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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The poor girl does not know how to have a conversation. Unfortunately, she does know how to speak.

The poor girl does not know how to have a conversation. Unfortunately, she does know how to speak.

by Winston Churchill Found in: Humour Quotes,
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There's no life without humour. It can make the wonderful moments of life truly glorious, and it can make tragic read more

There's no life without humour. It can make the wonderful moments of life truly glorious, and it can make tragic moments bearable.

by Rufus Wainwright Found in: Humour Quotes,
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I'm just a musical prostitute, my dear.

I'm just a musical prostitute, my dear.

by Freddie Mercury Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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