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  •   9  /  25  

    Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing any one who comes between them.

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  21  /  17  

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all read more

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.

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  25  /  22  

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been
extracted.

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been
extracted.

by Bill Cosby Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  17  /  24  

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

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  12  /  24  

A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife together.

A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife together.

by James H Boren Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  25  /  30  

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

by Oscar Wilde Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  24  /  21  

Experience, though non auctoritee
Were in this world, is right ynough to me
To speke of wo read more

Experience, though non auctoritee
Were in this world, is right ynough to me
To speke of wo that is in mariage. . . .

by Geoffrey Chaucer Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  14  /  17  

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having read more

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.

by Lyndon B. Johnson Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  11  /  11  

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

by Tommy Manville Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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  16  /  22  

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

by Henry Youngman Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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