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Dave Attell Quotes

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Dave Attell ( 8 of 8 )

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What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish, ... You know what you should read more

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish, ... You know what you should do? Combine them ... eat a penguin.

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're read more

You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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There's a late-night scene in every town, and everyone has something going on, ... I've heard good stories about (Syracuse); read more

There's a late-night scene in every town, and everyone has something going on, ... I've heard good stories about (Syracuse); this is a very good party town, a good drinking place. I definitely would like to come back and check it out further. Do some more research, as I call it.

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? read more

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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Every eight minutes, someone has sex with an animal...and you wonder why the attack you. Because of that man, and read more

Every eight minutes, someone has sex with an animal...and you wonder why the attack you. Because of that man, and its up to me and a half mexican to stop him!

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people ""the cops."" But you know, sometimes, read more

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people ""the cops."" But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.

Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people "the cops." But you know, sometimes, read more

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people "the cops." But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

by Dave Attell Found in: Miscellaneous Quotes,
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