Gracie Allen ( 9 of 9 )
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie comes home from the hospital after visiting a sick friend. (George) 'Where did you get the flowers?' (Gracie) 'I read more
Gracie comes home from the hospital after visiting a sick friend. (George) 'Where did you get the flowers?' (Gracie) 'I went to visit Mable.' (George) 'Yeah, so?' (Gracie) 'WELL, you told me to take her flowers!'
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a
half.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a
half.
This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.
This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.
My husband will never chase another woman. He's too fine, too decent, too old. [said when George Burns was only read more
My husband will never chase another woman. He's too fine, too decent, too old. [said when George Burns was only 64. He lived to be 100]
Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work read more
Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to, I'll develop my radio personality.
I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the read more
I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best.
The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.
The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.
When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.
When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.
