Jonathan Swift

And he gave it for his opinion, "that whoever could make two ears
of corn, or two blades of read more

And he gave it for his opinion, "that whoever could make two ears
of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground
where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and
do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of
politicians put together."

I warrant you lay abed till the cows came home.

I warrant you lay abed till the cows came home.

Modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense.

Modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense.

Flattery is the worst and falsest way of showing our esteem

Flattery is the worst and falsest way of showing our esteem

Hail, fellow, well met,
All dirty and wet:
Find out, if you can,
Who's read more

Hail, fellow, well met,
All dirty and wet:
Find out, if you can,
Who's master, who's man.