Louie Anderson

A real estate closer. Oh, what's that? I'm a real estate opener. What is a real estate closer? You mean read more

A real estate closer. Oh, what's that? I'm a real estate opener. What is a real estate closer? You mean at the end where you've got to sign all those papers?

I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew read more

I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew him off. I'll never forget the look on the young boy's face. He was devastated.

I'm a 7 o'clock act. My people want to go to a show, a dinner and then go home and read more

I'm a 7 o'clock act. My people want to go to a show, a dinner and then go home and go to bed.

I felt ashamed for what I had done. I don't have any excuses. I did what I did. I take read more

I felt ashamed for what I had done. I don't have any excuses. I did what I did. I take full responsibility for myself and my actions. I wouldn't pawn this off on anybody. I'm sorry it happened. And I hurt people.

Adam was looking for a comedian to do a 7 o'clock show. Two years ago, I was up for a read more

Adam was looking for a comedian to do a 7 o'clock show. Two years ago, I was up for a 10 o'clock show at another hotel, but I didn't want a 10 o'clock show. It isn't my crowd and I didn't think it would work.