Tallulah Bankhead

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education.

I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education.

I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as read more

I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as ditch water: I hate to go to bed, I hate to get up, and I hate to be alone.

Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.

Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.

It's one of the tragic ironies of the theatre that only one man in it can count on steady work read more

It's one of the tragic ironies of the theatre that only one man in it can count on steady work -- the night watchman.