And said to myself, as I lit my cigar,
"Supposing a man had the wealth of the Czar
read more

And said to myself, as I lit my cigar,
"Supposing a man had the wealth of the Czar
Of the Russias to boot, for the rest of his days,
On the whole do you think he would have much to spare
If he married a woman with nothing to wear?"

Her cap, far whiter than the driven snow,
Emblem right meet of decency does yield.

Her cap, far whiter than the driven snow,
Emblem right meet of decency does yield.

After all there is something about a wedding-gown prettier than
in any other gown in the world.

After all there is something about a wedding-gown prettier than
in any other gown in the world.

When his wife asked him to change clothes to meet the German
Ambassador: "If they want to see me, read more

When his wife asked him to change clothes to meet the German
Ambassador: "If they want to see me, here I am. If they want to
see my clothes, open my closet and show them my suits."

Dress drains our cellar dry,
And keeps our larder lean; puts out our fires
And introduces hunger, read more

Dress drains our cellar dry,
And keeps our larder lean; puts out our fires
And introduces hunger, frost, and woe,
Where peace and hospitality might reign.

To treat a poor wretch with a bottle of Burgundy, and fill his
snuff-box, is like giving a pair read more

To treat a poor wretch with a bottle of Burgundy, and fill his
snuff-box, is like giving a pair of laced ruffles to a man that
has never a shirt on his back.

When this old cap was new
'Tis since two hundred years.

When this old cap was new
'Tis since two hundred years.

Miss Flora McFlimsey of Madison Square,
Has made three separate journeys to Paris,
And her father assures read more

Miss Flora McFlimsey of Madison Square,
Has made three separate journeys to Paris,
And her father assures me each time she was there
That she and her friend Mrs. Harris . . .
Spent six consecutive weeks, without shopping
In one continuous round of shopping,-- . . .
And yet, though scarce three months have passed since the day
This merchandise went on twelve carts, up Broadway,
This same Miss McFlimsey of Madison Square
The last time we met was in utter despair
Becasue she had nothing whatever to wear.

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a
pitchfork.

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a
pitchfork.