The buttocks are the most aesthetically pleasing part of the body because they are non-functional. Although they conceal an essential read more

The buttocks are the most aesthetically pleasing part of the body because they are non-functional. Although they conceal an essential orifice, these pointless globes are as near as the human form can ever come to abstract art.

Art is a fruit that grows in man, like a fruit on a plant, or a child in its mother's read more

Art is a fruit that grows in man, like a fruit on a plant, or a child in its mother's womb.

Of all the arts in which the wise excel, nature's chief masterpiece is writing well.

Of all the arts in which the wise excel, nature's chief masterpiece is writing well.

I don't want to see pictures of Hollywood stars in their dressing gowns taking out the rubbish. It ruins the read more

I don't want to see pictures of Hollywood stars in their dressing gowns taking out the rubbish. It ruins the fantasy.

A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world.

A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world.

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow that talent to the dark place where it leads.

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow that talent to the dark place where it leads.

The first mistake of Art is to assume that it's serious.

The first mistake of Art is to assume that it's serious.

Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible. I think it's in my basement... let me go upstairs read more

Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible. I think it's in my basement... let me go upstairs and check.

In a decaying society, art, if it is truthful, must also reflect decay. And unless it wants to break faith read more

In a decaying society, art, if it is truthful, must also reflect decay. And unless it wants to break faith with its social function, art must show the world as changeable. And help to change it.