You should never name an animal which is not yours to keep, or which you intend to eat.

You should never name an animal which is not yours to keep, or which you intend to eat.

However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names. It read more

However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names. It is not so bad as you are. It looks poorest when you are the richest.

Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name is so he can tell when he's read more

Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) read more

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister (Mr.) are the three most distinctly disagreeable words in the language, in sound and sense. Two are corruptions of Mistress, the other of Master. If we must have them, let us be consistent and give one to the unmarried man. I venture to suggest Mush, abbreviated to MH.

Called me wessel, Sammy--a wessel of wrath.

Called me wessel, Sammy--a wessel of wrath.

Known by the sobriquet of "The Artful Dodger."

Known by the sobriquet of "The Artful Dodger."

Some to the fascination of a name,
Surrender judgment hoodwinked.

Some to the fascination of a name,
Surrender judgment hoodwinked.

The dodgerest of all the dodgers.

The dodgerest of all the dodgers.

Ah! replied my gentle fair,
Beloved, what are names but air?
Choose thou, whatever suits the line:
read more

Ah! replied my gentle fair,
Beloved, what are names but air?
Choose thou, whatever suits the line:
Call me Sappho, call me Chloris,
Call me Lalage, or Doris,
Only, only, call me thine.