Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.

A politician will always tip off his true belief by stating the opposite at the beginning of the sentence. For read more

A politician will always tip off his true belief by stating the opposite at the beginning of the sentence. For maximum comprehension, do not start listening until the first clause is concluded. Begin instead at the word "but" which begins the second, or active, clause. This is the way to tell a liberal from a conservative -- before they tell you. Thus: "I have always believed in a strong national defense, second to none, but ... " (a liberal, about to propose a $20 billion defense cut).

Fortunately for themselves and for the world, nearly all men are cowards and dare not act on what they believe. read more

Fortunately for themselves and for the world, nearly all men are cowards and dare not act on what they believe. Nearly all our disasters come of a few fools having the "courage of their convictions.".

It is not for him to pride himself who loveth his own country, but rather for him who loveth the read more

It is not for him to pride himself who loveth his own country, but rather for him who loveth the whole world. The earth is but one country and mankind its citizens.

I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it.

I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it.

It is the nature of slavery to render its victims so abject that at last, fearing to be free, they read more

It is the nature of slavery to render its victims so abject that at last, fearing to be free, they multiply their own chains. You can liberate a freeman, but you cannot liberate a slave.

Despair and misery are static factors. The dynamism of an uprising flows from hope and pride. Not actual suffering but read more

Despair and misery are static factors. The dynamism of an uprising flows from hope and pride. Not actual suffering but the hope of better things incites people to revolt.

Lookit, I've done it their way this far and now it's my turn. I'm my own handler. Any questions? Ask read more

Lookit, I've done it their way this far and now it's my turn. I'm my own handler. Any questions? Ask me... There's not going to be any more handler stories because I'm the handler... I'm Doctor Spin.