Giving jazz the Congressional seal of approval is a little like making Huck Finn an honorary Boy Scout.

Giving jazz the Congressional seal of approval is a little like making Huck Finn an honorary Boy Scout.

Colors that blend with the brick and the dark waters of the city's canals - greens, browns and the strong read more

Colors that blend with the brick and the dark waters of the city's canals - greens, browns and the strong shade of oxblood that is known as Bruges red.

The buttocks are the most aesthetically pleasing part of the body because they are non-functional. Although they conceal an essential read more

The buttocks are the most aesthetically pleasing part of the body because they are non-functional. Although they conceal an essential orifice, these pointless globes are as near as the human form can ever come to abstract art.

The history of modern art is also the history of the progressive loss of art's audience. Art has increasingly become read more

The history of modern art is also the history of the progressive loss of art's audience. Art has increasingly become the concern of the artist and the bafflement of the public.

Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible. I think it's in my basement... let me go upstairs read more

Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible. I think it's in my basement... let me go upstairs and check.

Fine art, that exists for itself alone, is art in a final state of impotence. If nobody, including the artist, read more

Fine art, that exists for itself alone, is art in a final state of impotence. If nobody, including the artist, acknowledges art as a means of knowing the world, then art is relegated to a kind of rumpus room of the mind and the irresponsibility of the artist and the irrelevance of art to actual living becomes part and parcel of the practice of art.

Art is permitted to survive only if it renounces the right to be different, and integrates itself into the omnipotent read more

Art is permitted to survive only if it renounces the right to be different, and integrates itself into the omnipotent realm of the profane.

Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all read more

Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details.

Impressionism is the newspaper of the soul.

Impressionism is the newspaper of the soul.