How goes it now, sir? This news which is called true is so like
an old tale that the read more

How goes it now, sir? This news which is called true is so like
an old tale that the verity of it is in strong suspicion.

News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her read more

News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her compliments sends;
And this is the news from Hell!

. . . by evil report and good report . . .

. . . by evil report and good report . . .

Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

Ill news, madam,
Are swallow-winged, but what's good
Walks on crutches.

Ill news, madam,
Are swallow-winged, but what's good
Walks on crutches.

We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We read more

We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We don't have to - we travel in fake ethics.

Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: read more

Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: he's friends with Caesar,
In state of health, thou say'st, and thou say'st, free.

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

For evil news rides post, while good news baits.

For evil news rides post, while good news baits.