Yet the first bringer of unwelcome news
Hath but a losing office, and his tongue
Sounds ever read more

Yet the first bringer of unwelcome news
Hath but a losing office, and his tongue
Sounds ever after as a sullen bell,
Rememb'red tolling a departing friend.

We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We read more

We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We don't have to - we travel in fake ethics.

News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her read more

News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her compliments sends;
And this is the news from Hell!

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

The American people deserve to know that they're not just watching the administration's spin on their local newscasts -- they're read more

The American people deserve to know that they're not just watching the administration's spin on their local newscasts -- they're paying for it, too.

The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.

The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.

Ram thou fruitful tidings in mine ears,
That long time have been barren.

Ram thou fruitful tidings in mine ears,
That long time have been barren.

Ten day ago I drowned these news in tears;
And now, to add more measure to your woes,
read more

Ten day ago I drowned these news in tears;
And now, to add more measure to your woes,
I come to tell you things sith then befallen.

He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?

He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?