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  •   27  /  28  

    Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They don’t know they’re being funny.

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  7  /  17  

The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.

The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.

by Robert Mugabe Found in: News Quotes,
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  29  /  29  

(Pistol:) And tidings do I bring and lucky joys
And golden times and happy news of price.
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(Pistol:) And tidings do I bring and lucky joys
And golden times and happy news of price.
(Falstaff:) I pray thee now, deliver them like a man of this
world.

by William Shakespeare Found in: News Quotes,
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  26  /  44  

For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't… you know, it's interesting. read more

For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't… you know, it's interesting. I think we don't make things up. We just distill it to, hopefully, its most humorous nugget. And in that sense it seems faked and skewed just because we don't have to be subjective or pretend to be objective. We can just put it out there.

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  10  /  28  

For evil news rides post, while good news baits.

For evil news rides post, while good news baits.

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  8  /  30  

Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

by Edward Lear Found in: News Quotes,
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  23  /  41  

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

by William Shakespeare Found in: News Quotes,
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  8  /  12  

If't be summer news,
Smile to't before; if winterly, thou need'st
But keep that count'nance still.

If't be summer news,
Smile to't before; if winterly, thou need'st
But keep that count'nance still.

by William Shakespeare Found in: News Quotes,
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  8  /  14  

Where village statesmen talk'd with looks profound.
And news much older than their ale went round.

Where village statesmen talk'd with looks profound.
And news much older than their ale went round.

by Oliver Goldsmith Found in: News Quotes,
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  14  /  30  

What, what, what,
What's the news from Sway?
Sad news,
Bad news,
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What, what, what,
What's the news from Sway?
Sad news,
Bad news,
Comes by the cable; led
Through the Indian Ocean's bed,
Through the Persian Gulf, the Red
Sea, and the Med-

by George Thomas Lanigan Found in: News Quotes,
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