Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you read more

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?".

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, read more

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know." "We killed him because he didn't want to become a doctor, that's why we killed him.".

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Murphy's First Corollary If you tell the boss you read more

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Murphy's First Corollary If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

A man must not swallow more beliefs than he can digest.

A man must not swallow more beliefs than he can digest.

The devil personifies not the nature that is around us but the nature that is within us- the infinitely ferocious read more

The devil personifies not the nature that is around us but the nature that is within us- the infinitely ferocious and cunning prehuman creature that is still within us, sealed in the subconscious cellars of the psyche.

to be nobody-but-myself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me everybody else means, read more

to be nobody-but-myself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me everybody else means, to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight, and never stop fighting.

Fellowship with God means warfare with the world.

Fellowship with God means warfare with the world.

The best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds.

The best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds.

The beauty of religious mania is that it has the power to explain everything. Once God (or Satan) is accepted read more

The beauty of religious mania is that it has the power to explain everything. Once God (or Satan) is accepted as the first cause of everything which happens in the mortal world, nothing is left to chance...logic can be happily tossed out the window.