Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into thereoms.

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into thereoms.

As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never read more

As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.

I'm not really a heavy smoker any more. I only get through two lighters a day now.

I'm not really a heavy smoker any more. I only get through two lighters a day now.

There are two kinds of statistics: the kind you look up and the kind you make up

There are two kinds of statistics: the kind you look up and the kind you make up

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Statistics are no substitute for judgment

Statistics are no substitute for judgment

Before a cure is found we will all have been affected one way or another.

Before a cure is found we will all have been affected one way or another.

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after read more

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.