Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best read more

Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off.

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.

I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.
(When asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf)

I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.
(When asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf)

I don't like this new law, because your first instinct when you see a man on the ground is to read more

I don't like this new law, because your first instinct when you see a man on the ground is to go down on him

The character of a person is in direct proportion to his
commitment to excellence.

The character of a person is in direct proportion to his
commitment to excellence.

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball

Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.

Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

The more I train the more I realize I have more speed in me.

The more I train the more I realize I have more speed in me.