I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways

That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways

Give the American people a good cause, and there's nothing they can't lick.

Give the American people a good cause, and there's nothing they can't lick.

My reaction to porno films is as follows; After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw, read more

My reaction to porno films is as follows; After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw, After the first twenty minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.

The trouble with censors is that they worry if a girl has cleavage. They ought to worry if she hasn't read more

The trouble with censors is that they worry if a girl has cleavage. They ought to worry if she hasn't any.

I came out here with one suit and everybody said I looked like a bum. Twenty years later Marlon Brando read more

I came out here with one suit and everybody said I looked like a bum. Twenty years later Marlon Brando came out with only a sweatshirt and the town drooled over him. That shows how much Hollywood has progressed.

In feature films the director is God; in documentary films God is the director.

In feature films the director is God; in documentary films God is the director.