Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out a window.

Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out a window.

Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's read more

Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.

Ideas are fatal to caste.

Ideas are fatal to caste.

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.

In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update would like to remind you: read more

In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every computer that that computer has ever linked up to.

The consequences of things are not always proportionate to the apparent magnitude of those events that have produced them. Thus read more

The consequences of things are not always proportionate to the apparent magnitude of those events that have produced them. Thus the American Revolution, from which little was expected, produced much; but the French Revolution, from which much was expected, produced little.

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those that break down and those read more

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.

Science is simply common sense at its best, that is, rigidly accurate in observation, and merciless to fallacy in logic.

Science is simply common sense at its best, that is, rigidly accurate in observation, and merciless to fallacy in logic.

What we know is not much; what we do not know is immense.

What we know is not much; what we do not know is immense.