Erma Bombeck

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.

Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely.

Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a read more

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me.

One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop read more

One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.