Erma Bombeck

Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.

Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.

Vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer.

Vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer.

It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of supersophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.

It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of supersophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.