Gracie Allen

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a
half.

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a
half.

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.

Gracie comes home from the hospital after visiting a sick friend. (George) 'Where did you get the flowers?' (Gracie) 'I read more

Gracie comes home from the hospital after visiting a sick friend. (George) 'Where did you get the flowers?' (Gracie) 'I went to visit Mable.' (George) 'Yeah, so?' (Gracie) 'WELL, you told me to take her flowers!'

My husband will never chase another woman. He's too fine, too decent, too old. [said when George Burns was only read more

My husband will never chase another woman. He's too fine, too decent, too old. [said when George Burns was only 64. He lived to be 100]

This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.

This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.