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There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes.
They're trying to find her to stop her.
There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes.
They're trying to find her to stop her.
One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to DisneyLand, read more
One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to DisneyLand, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said, "DisneyLand burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real DisneyLand, but it was getting pretty late.
A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the read more
A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road.
I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend.
Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to read more
Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press read more
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
Humour has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.
Humour has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.
I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye.
I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye.
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw read more
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.
