If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing you grandmother with her teeth out.

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing you grandmother with her teeth out.

The first kiss I had was the most disgusting thing in my life. The girl injected about a pound of read more

The first kiss I had was the most disgusting thing in my life. The girl injected about a pound of saliva, into my mouth, and when I walked away I had to spit it all out.

Always remember this: 'A kiss will never miss, and after many kisses a miss becomes a misses'.

Always remember this: 'A kiss will never miss, and after many kisses a miss becomes a misses'.

A legal kiss is never as good as a stolen one

A legal kiss is never as good as a stolen one

I can't read lips unless they're touching mine.

I can't read lips unless they're touching mine.

Teach not thy lip such scorn, for it was made For kissing, lady, not for such contempt.

Teach not thy lip such scorn, for it was made For kissing, lady, not for such contempt.

I do not know how to kiss, or I would kiss you. Where do the noses go?

I do not know how to kiss, or I would kiss you. Where do the noses go?

Life, the gift of nature, Love, the gift of life, a Kiss, the gift of Love

Life, the gift of nature, Love, the gift of life, a Kiss, the gift of Love

I kissed her hard and held her tight and tried to open her lips; they were closed tight.

I kissed her hard and held her tight and tried to open her lips; they were closed tight.