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I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say read more

I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say what the shit does, and add "er". I wanna work for the Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. Hey, what does that do? It keeps shit fresh. Well, that's a fresher....I'm going on break.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Laziness Quotes,
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A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two different things.

A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two different things.

by Benjamin Franklin Found in: Laziness Quotes,
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Procrastination is suicide on the installment plan.

Procrastination is suicide on the installment plan.

by Anon. Found in: Laziness Quotes,
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Oh, if only I did nothing simply as a result of laziness.

Oh, if only I did nothing simply as a result of laziness.

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Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

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Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over read more

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load his shit into a truck.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Laziness Quotes,
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I don't think necessity is the mother of invention - invention, in my opinion, arises directly from idleness, possibly also read more

I don't think necessity is the mother of invention - invention, in my opinion, arises directly from idleness, possibly also from laziness. To save oneself trouble.

by Agatha Christie Found in: Laziness Quotes,
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You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might read more

You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might send a ball rolling through it!

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Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to read more

Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to find an easy way of doing it.

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