Those who talk most about the blessings of marriage and the
constancy of its vows are the very people read more

Those who talk most about the blessings of marriage and the
constancy of its vows are the very people who declare that if the
chain were broken and the prisoners were left free to choose, the
whole social fabric would fly asunder. You can't have the
argument both ways. If the prisoner is happy, why lock him in?
If he is not, why pretend that he is?

Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife clearly understood that they are on the same side.

Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife clearly understood that they are on the same side.

A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.

A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having read more

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he read more

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he was single.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.

Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation
with the maximum of opportunity.

There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man read more

There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.