Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.

Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.

Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.

Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

Men don't know much about women. We do know when they're happy. We know when they're crying, and we know read more

Men don't know much about women. We do know when they're happy. We know when they're crying, and we know when they're pissed off. We just don't know in what order these are gonna come at us.

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

Why did Nature create man? Was it to show that she is big enough to make mistakes, or was it read more

Why did Nature create man? Was it to show that she is big enough to make mistakes, or was it pure ignorance?

A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.

Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.