But we are at war, and we here at THE DAILY SHOW will do our best to keep you informed of any late-breaking...humor we can find. Of course, our show is obviously at a disadvantage compared to the many news sources that we're competing with… at a disadvantage in several respects. For one thing, we are fake. They are not. So in terms of credibility we are, well, oddly enough, actually about even. We're about even.
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Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!
Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!
Ten day ago I drowned these news in tears;
And now, to add more measure to your woes,
read more
Ten day ago I drowned these news in tears;
And now, to add more measure to your woes,
I come to tell you things sith then befallen.
. . . by evil report and good report . . .
. . . by evil report and good report . . .
As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.
As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.
Ram thou fruitful tidings in mine ears,
That long time have been barren.
Ram thou fruitful tidings in mine ears,
That long time have been barren.
Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: read more
Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: he's friends with Caesar,
In state of health, thou say'st, and thou say'st, free.
News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her read more
News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her compliments sends;
And this is the news from Hell!
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
Stay a little and news will find you.
Stay a little and news will find you.
