Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

Who, or why, or which, or what,
Is the Akhond of Swat?

But we are at war, and we here at THE DAILY SHOW will do our best to keep you informed read more

But we are at war, and we here at THE DAILY SHOW will do our best to keep you informed of any late-breaking...humor we can find. Of course, our show is obviously at a disadvantage compared to the many news sources that we're competing with… at a disadvantage in several respects. For one thing, we are fake. They are not. So in terms of credibility we are, well, oddly enough, actually about even. We're about even.

As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.

As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.

Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They read more

Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They don’t know they’re being funny.

He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?

He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?

Ill news, madam,
Are swallow-winged, but what's good
Walks on crutches.

Ill news, madam,
Are swallow-winged, but what's good
Walks on crutches.

Stay a little and news will find you.

Stay a little and news will find you.

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

Master, master, old news! And such news as you never heard of!

It’s hard to believe that in the greatest democracy in the world, we need legislation to prevent the government from read more

It’s hard to believe that in the greatest democracy in the world, we need legislation to prevent the government from writing and paying for the news.