Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings.

Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings.

In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.

In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.

How is your health? I feel pretty good, and I'm very anxious to get the season going. I think we read more

How is your health? I feel pretty good, and I'm very anxious to get the season going. I think we have a chance to have a good football team. I don't have any health problems. I don't know how any of the stuff gets started.... My health is very good.

Coming out of BYU's football spring, 1999, practice: We might have a chance to be pretty good.

Coming out of BYU's football spring, 1999, practice: We might have a chance to be pretty good.

I'm old, old enough to play baseball or football. I'm not eight yet. My Mom told me when you start read more

I'm old, old enough to play baseball or football. I'm not eight yet. My Mom told me when you start baseball, you aren't going to be able to run that fast because you had an operation. I told Mom I wouldn't need to run fast. When I play baseball, I'll just hit them out of the park. Then I'll be able to walk.

Martha was watching the football game with me when she said, 'You know, most of these sports are based on read more

Martha was watching the football game with me when she said, 'You know, most of these sports are based on the idea of one group protecting its territory from invasion by another group.' 'Yeah,' I said, trying not to laugh. Girls are funny.

I feel an autumnal Saturday, no matter how beautiful, is wasted if it doesn't find me sitting in on a read more

I feel an autumnal Saturday, no matter how beautiful, is wasted if it doesn't find me sitting in on a football game.

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some read more

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER

Pro football is like nuclear warfare. there are no winners, only survivors.

Pro football is like nuclear warfare. there are no winners, only survivors.