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  •   9  /  16  

    I'm old, old enough to play baseball or football. I'm not eight yet. My Mom told me when you start baseball, you aren't going to be able to run that fast because you had an operation. I told Mom I wouldn't need to run fast. When I play baseball, I'll just hit them out of the park. Then I'll be able to walk.

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  9  /  18  

Martha was watching the football game with me when she said, 'You know, most of these sports are based on read more

Martha was watching the football game with me when she said, 'You know, most of these sports are based on the idea of one group protecting its territory from invasion by another group.' 'Yeah,' I said, trying not to laugh. Girls are funny.

by Jack Handey Found in: Sports:football Quotes,
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  18  /  17  

Being in politics is like coaching football. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough read more

Being in politics is like coaching football. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important.

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  17  /  35  

Football is a game of cliches, and I believe in every one of them.

Football is a game of cliches, and I believe in every one of them.

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  15  /  18  

Describing an opposing team: Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck.

Describing an opposing team: Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck.

by Don Schula Found in: Sports:football Quotes,
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  13  /  21  

Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it read more

Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn't seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces.

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  7  /  9  

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some read more

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER

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  22  /  15  

In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.

In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard.

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  17  /  31  

If you are worshipping false gods—such as football, baseball, gold, tennis, or money or technology or automobiles or houses or read more

If you are worshipping false gods—such as football, baseball, gold, tennis, or money or technology or automobiles or houses or gold or silver—and you can tell what a man worships by what he does on Sunday—repent and start worshipping the true and living God, the maker of heaven and earth and all things that in them are.

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  9  /  16  

Coming out of BYU's football spring, 1999, practice: We might have a chance to be pretty good.

Coming out of BYU's football spring, 1999, practice: We might have a chance to be pretty good.

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