The capon burns, the pig falls from the spit,
The clock hath strucken twelve upon the bell;
My mistress made it one upon my cheek:
She is so hot because the meat is cold;
The meat is cold because you come not home;
You come not home because you have no stomach;
You have no stomach, having broke your fast;
But we, that know what 'tis to fast and pray,
Are penitent for your default to-day.
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Digestion, much like Love and Wine, no trifling will brook:
His cook once spoiled the dinner of an Emperor read more
Digestion, much like Love and Wine, no trifling will brook:
His cook once spoiled the dinner of an Emperor of men;
The dinner spoiled the temper of his Majesty and then
The Emperor made history--and no one blamed the cook.
"Very well," cried I, "that's a good girl; I find you are
perfectly qualified for making converts, and so read more
"Very well," cried I, "that's a good girl; I find you are
perfectly qualified for making converts, and so go help your
mother to make the gooseberry bye."
A cook should double one sense have: for he
Should taster for himself and master be.
A cook should double one sense have: for he
Should taster for himself and master be.
Every investigation which is guided by principles of nature fixes
its ultimate aim entirely on gratifying the stomach.
Every investigation which is guided by principles of nature fixes
its ultimate aim entirely on gratifying the stomach.
The vulgar boil, the learned roast, an egg.
The vulgar boil, the learned roast, an egg.
I seem to you cruel and too much addicted to gluttony, when I
beat my cook for sending up read more
I seem to you cruel and too much addicted to gluttony, when I
beat my cook for sending up a bad dinner. If that appears to you
too trifling a cause, say for what cause you would have a cook
flogged.
Her that ruled the rost in the kitchen.
Her that ruled the rost in the kitchen.
Hallo! A great deal of steam! the pudding was out of the
copper. A smell like a washing-day! That read more
Hallo! A great deal of steam! the pudding was out of the
copper. A smell like a washing-day! That was the cloth. A
smell like an eating-house and a pastrycook's next door to each
other, with a laundress's next door to that. That was the
pudding.
I never strove to rule the roast,
She ne'er refus'd to pledge my toast.
I never strove to rule the roast,
She ne'er refus'd to pledge my toast.
