Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed.

Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage";.

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage";.

Marriage is like life - it is a field of battle, not a bed of roses.

Marriage is like life - it is a field of battle, not a bed of roses.

Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.

Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds--they mature slowly.

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds--they mature slowly.

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he read more

No married man is genuinely happy if he has to drink worse whisky than he used to drink when he was single.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that night.

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that night.