Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

Men marry to make an end; women to make a beginning.

Men marry to make an end; women to make a beginning.

It's not beauty but fine qualities, my girl, that keep a husband.

It's not beauty but fine qualities, my girl, that keep a husband.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that night.

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that night.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

What God hath joined together no man shall put asunder; God will
take care of that.

What God hath joined together no man shall put asunder; God will
take care of that.