You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your read more

You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your family.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

The kind of power mothers have is enormous. Take the skyline of Istanbul -- enormous breasts, pathetic little willies, a read more

The kind of power mothers have is enormous. Take the skyline of Istanbul -- enormous breasts, pathetic little willies, a final revenge on Islam. I was so scared I had to crouch in the bottom of the boat when I saw it.

Femininity appears to be one of those pivotal qualities that is so important no one can define it.

Femininity appears to be one of those pivotal qualities that is so important no one can define it.

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they read more

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they die earlier.

Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where read more

Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is the temple where they worship arrested development.

Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.

Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.

It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.

It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.