I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

There is always a chance that he who sets himself up as his brother's keeper will end up by being read more

There is always a chance that he who sets himself up as his brother's keeper will end up by being his jail-keeper.

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind read more

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.

In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.

In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.

Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.

Where can a person be better than in the bosom of their family.

Where can a person be better than in the bosom of their family.

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they read more

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they die earlier.