Ceremony and ritual spring from our heart of hearts: those who govern us know it well, for they would sooner read more

Ceremony and ritual spring from our heart of hearts: those who govern us know it well, for they would sooner deny us bread than dare alter the observance of tradition.

A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

The majority of persons choose their wives with as little prudence as they eat. They see a troll with nothing read more

The majority of persons choose their wives with as little prudence as they eat. They see a troll with nothing else to recommend her but a pair of thighs and choice hunkers, and so smart to void their seed that they marry her at once. They imagine they can live in marvelous contentment with handsome feet and ambrosial buttocks. Most men are accredited fools shortly after they leave the womb.

For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely unnatural condition.

For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely unnatural condition.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.

He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.

Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...but she's certain that read more

Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher.

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher.