Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

Give the American people a good cause, and there's nothing they can't lick.

Give the American people a good cause, and there's nothing they can't lick.

Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world.

Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world.

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.

So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. read more

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause — you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

In the 1930s people went to see films not just to be entertained or to escape the dreariness of their read more

In the 1930s people went to see films not just to be entertained or to escape the dreariness of their workaday lives but to gain an education, to see the world, to learn table manners and interior decoration, how to dress, kiss, to laugh and cry, how to react to tragedy and happiness, how to be brave, evil and good.