Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and read more

Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with

A man's as old as he's feeling. A woman as old as she looks.

A man's as old as he's feeling. A woman as old as she looks.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead read more

Do you know why the Lord withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.

Men represent the triumph of mind over morals, whereas women represent the triumph of matter over mind.

Men represent the triumph of mind over morals, whereas women represent the triumph of matter over mind.

Women and cats do as they damned well please, and men and dogs had best learn to live with it.

Women and cats do as they damned well please, and men and dogs had best learn to live with it.

Any girl can be glamorous; all you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

Any girl can be glamorous; all you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

It is the difference between men and women, not the sameness, that creates the tension and the delight.

It is the difference between men and women, not the sameness, that creates the tension and the delight.

Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then they turn read more

Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then they turn full-bodied with age until they go sour and vinegary and give you a headache.