Dogs

Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me read more

Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar.

No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own read more

No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater. . . suggest that he wear read more

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater. . . suggest that he wear a tail.

How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg read more

How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may -make a fool of yourself with him and not only read more

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may -make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.

Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as much as the dog does.

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as much as the dog does.

I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically read more

I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.

Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies.

Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies.

Well-washed and well-combed domestic pets grow dull; they miss the stimulus of fleas.

Well-washed and well-combed domestic pets grow dull; they miss the stimulus of fleas.