Maxioms by Mitch Hedberg
Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, read more
My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'
I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say read more
I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say what the shit does, and add "er". I wanna work for the Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. Hey, what does that do? It keeps shit fresh. Well, that's a fresher....I'm going on break.
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them read more
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
