Maxioms by W. C. Fields
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad.
Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad.
Happiness means quiet nerves.
Happiness means quiet nerves.
Horse sense is a good judgement which keeps horses from betting on people.
Horse sense is a good judgement which keeps horses from betting on people.
