I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this read more

I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling.

When treading London's well-known ground
If e'er I feel my spirits tire,
I haul my sail, look read more

When treading London's well-known ground
If e'er I feel my spirits tire,
I haul my sail, look up around,
In search of Whitbread's best entire.
- Unattributed Author,

If after the manner of men I have fought with beasts at Ephesus,
what advantageth it me, if the read more

If after the manner of men I have fought with beasts at Ephesus,
what advantageth it me, if the dead rise not? let us eat and
drink; for to morrow we die.

If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim.

If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim.

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

"Wery good power o' suction, Sammy," said Mr. Weller the
elder. . . . "You'd ha' made an uncommon read more

"Wery good power o' suction, Sammy," said Mr. Weller the
elder. . . . "You'd ha' made an uncommon fine oyster, Sammy, if
you'd been born in that station o' life."

Here
With my beer
I sit,
While golden moments flit:
read more

Here
With my beer
I sit,
While golden moments flit:
Alas!
They pass
Unheeded by:
And as they fly,
I,
Being dry,
Sit, idly sipping here
My beer.

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're read more

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.