Maxioms Pet

X
  •   11  /  17  

    There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes.
    They're trying to find her to stop her.

    by Jr Found in Humor Quotes,
Share to:

You May Also Like   /   View all maxioms

  ( comments )
  16  /  22  

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.

by Bob Edwards Found in: Humor Quotes, Laughter Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  23  /  25  

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.

by Edward Albee Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  22  /  22  

Humor is not a postscript or an incidental afterthought; it is a serious and weighty part of the world's economy. read more

Humor is not a postscript or an incidental afterthought; it is a serious and weighty part of the world's economy. One feels increasingly the height of the faculty in which it arises, the nobility of things associated with it, and the greatness of services it renders. - Oscar Firkins: Memoirs and Letters.

by Oscar W. Firkins Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  16  /  22  

He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.

He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.

by Anthony Burgess Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  13  /  36  

My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke
in the world.

My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke
in the world.

by George Bernard Shaw Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  25  /  20  

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, read more

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. 'Oh, no,' I said, 'Disneyland burned down.' He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.

by Jack Handey Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  33  /  37  

If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.

If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.

by Helen Giangregorio Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  30  /  37  

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's read more

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

by Jack Handey Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  26  /  20  

Folks that blurt out just what they think wouldn't be so bad if they thought.

Folks that blurt out just what they think wouldn't be so bad if they thought.

by Kin Hubbard Found in: Humor Quotes, Thoughts Quotes,
Share to:
Maxioms Web Pet