Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.

Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

If all men are born free, why is it that all women are born slaves?

If all men are born free, why is it that all women are born slaves?

Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired

Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired

Being a gentleman is the number one priority, the chief question integral to our national life.

Being a gentleman is the number one priority, the chief question integral to our national life.

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like read more

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

A small family is soon provided for.

A small family is soon provided for.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in read more

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

Such a wife as I want... must be young, handsome I lay most stress upon a good shape, sensible a read more

Such a wife as I want... must be young, handsome I lay most stress upon a good shape, sensible a little learning will do, well-bread, chaste, and tender. As to religion, a moderate stock will satisfy me. She must believe in God and hate a saint.