The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him.

The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

We've chosen the path to equality, don't let them turn us around.

We've chosen the path to equality, don't let them turn us around.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, read more

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.

To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.

Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.

Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.