If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the read more

If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the time, then both are useless.

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. read more

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause — you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

Men forget everything; women remember everything.

Men forget everything; women remember everything.

A film is a petrified fountain of thought.

A film is a petrified fountain of thought.

If I find a film dull, I find it infinitely more entertaining to watch the scratches.

If I find a film dull, I find it infinitely more entertaining to watch the scratches.

Unless he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you.

Unless he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you.

Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.

I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache.