Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time.

Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time.

The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night read more

The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night looking for it.

Fans don't boo nobodies.

Fans don't boo nobodies.

Slump? I ain't in no slump... I just ain't hitting.

Slump? I ain't in no slump... I just ain't hitting.

They say some of my stars drink whiskey. But I have found that the ones who drink milkshakes don't win read more

They say some of my stars drink whiskey. But I have found that the ones who drink milkshakes don't win many ballgames.

The guy with the biggest stomach will be the first to take off his shirt at a baseball game.

The guy with the biggest stomach will be the first to take off his shirt at a baseball game.

Congratulations. I knew the record would stand until it was broken.

Congratulations. I knew the record would stand until it was broken.

All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives, 'See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me read more

All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives, 'See, there's a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer.'

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.