Dave Barry

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see with the naked eye unless read more

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot read more

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot masturbate

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise read more

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management read more

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.

A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer

A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer